Why I NEED the Writing Community (and so do you)

and the wonder that is the NorCal Writers Retreat

I’m taking this week off from discussing book awards so I don’t get too far away from my time at the NorCal Writer’s Retreat before sharing my experience. Writing is what keeps me balanced. When I can’t find the time or headspace to write, I’m less happy—less calm and less fulfilled. I’m a less effective lawyer and a less patient mother and spouse. Exercising the creative side of my brain keeps me sane.

Beyond that, the writing community is a refuge. Folks, it’s been a rough couple of years personally, and sometimes I get so worn out by the seeming impossibility of escaping negativity and unkindness. If I could be off of social media completely, I would. But as a writer, social media is central to how I promote myself, amplify other writers and learn about the industry.

Enter the writing community. Thank God for you. With few exceptions, the writing community, which includes authors and readers, are kind, supportive and frankly, so much fun. Filling my substack feed with the your reading, writing and publication news is what keeps me afloat some days.

NorCal Writers Retreat

I’ve been desperate to go on a writing retreat for a couple of years now. My last retreat with fantasy and science fiction writers to Morro Bay was several years ago and I’ve been longing to escape to the company of my fellow authors.

I became aware of the NorCal Writers Retreat in 2020 when I connected with its founder, Heather Lazare, about a project I needed editorial support for. The timing didn’t work out for us, but I asked her to keep me on the retreat list and have been longing to go ever since. I wanted to go to a live retreat, not a virtual one, and finally, this year, the fates lined up in my favor and I was accepted and able to attend.

What is a Writing Retreat?

What happens on a retreat depends on its mission. Many retreats are primarily educational, offering programming and workshops. Others may focus on specific genres. Some retreats are specifically about honing your pitch and pitching your works to editors and agents. And some, like NorCal, are focused on writing and workshopping pages in a peaceful environment where work can be accomplished. A side benefit is that many of these writing retreat are in beautiful locations (and if you are a professional writer, arguably deductible!)

NorCal was just what I needed. The retreat takes place in Carmel Valley, California, about a 2 hour drive from SFO. The landscape is spectacular, mountainous and covered in bright orange flowers.

Heather runs an amazing program. Each retreat consists of 18 writers, 2 agents, 1 editor and 1 author-in-residence.

The 18 attending authors are split into three groups of 6. In advance of the retreat, we shared pages so that we could workshop our submissions with the other writers and with one of the agents or the editor.

In addition to workingshopping our pages, we enjoyed presentations from the agents and from our author-in-residence. They were so generous with sharing their experiences, advice, journey and most of all, their time. You don’t often get to sit down with top agents over multiple meals, barraging them with questions, and get only smiles and great advice in return. This was a wonderful opportunity. Stephanie Delman, co-founder of Trellis Literary Management and Jill Marr (who lead my crit group) from Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency were so patient with us! Our author in residence, Zakiya Dalila Harris, author of “The Other Black Girl,” was so much fun to talk to. Her book and her personal journey were amazing and I highly recommend the Hulu series based on her book!

My fellow authors were so interesting. The writing and ideas everyone brought to the table were fascinating. Rotating around during meals gave me the opportunity to meet everyone at the retreat and learn a little about their writing lives. Most importantly, I got SO much writing done. I left the retreat reinspired, reinvigorated and with a ton of new writing friends to stay in touch and to share work with.

Who Is This Retreat For?

The NorCal Retreat requires that you submit sample work for consideration and that you be accepted. Once you are accepted and are an alum, you can attend future NorCal retreats without having to be accepted again. While I don’t know what the specific acceptance criteria for the retreat is, overall, this was a seasoned bunch of writers who knew their craft. Many have been writing for years and many of us were already published. If you are a novice and still working on basic craft, I’d recommend retreats that are focused on education and craft. Save this one for when you have sufficiently progressed your craft.

What Is The Location Like?

The retreat takes place at Hidden Valley Institute for the Arts. The rooms were very basic, but comfortable, as was the setting and the food. There were plenty of places to curl up and write, including at the in-room desks. There were also massages available for those who wished to partake, and a short, easy walk to the small town. Food was simple, but good, as was the wine. There was also yoga every day that targeted all of those writer’s knots! The retreat was very affordable and they offer some assistance to those who need!

Would I Go Back?

Hell yes!! This was a wonderful retreat. I learned so much, met wonderful writers and professionals and got a ton of writing done. I returned home feeling renewed, peaceful and reinvigorated. Shocking to no one but me, my family did just fine without me. Dare I say that it was even good for everyone that I was gone a few days?

For my next retreat, I admit I’m eying some exotic options, probably somewhere in Europe (Greece seems like a nice place to write…), but I would (and will!) definitely return to NorCal in the future. The only thing I’d do differently is make sure I get into town to try some wine and eat some Artichokes!

What Retreats Do You Suggest?

There are tons of writing retreat options out there and I’ve been to very few. Here is a post I did a couple of months ago on the topic:

In addition to what I covered in my previous post, if you are looking for a virtual retreat, I highly recommend The Shit No One Tells You About Writing’s Deep Dive Series. Once you are more advanced in your writing, it can be hard to find retreats that aren’t too basic. Retreats that are meant to be valuable to everyone are particularly hard to find. The brilliant minds behind TSNOTY do a great job of providing information and advice that is valuable no matter where you are in your writing journey.

TikTok Things I’m Enjoying from the Writing Community

I am generally not a fan of TikTok and don’t go there often, but some of the writers and BookTokers I follow do a great job of putting a smile on my face.

I love ToriThatNerd for her sci-fi and fantasy specific recs. She does some fun, focus posts, such as Favorite Sci Fi Books by Female Authors and Guide to Blake Crouch (I love that guy).

My fellow

Winding Road Stories

Author Alex Nader does a super funny series “Authors in My Head Support Group.”

Blueishwitch does very good, creepy booktoks. Here is her review of ReInception.

That’s it for this week! Next week, I’ll be releasing the next chapter of The Collector and after that, I’ll return to my last few book award review.

What are your favorite retreats and who are some of your favorite book/writing influencers? Please share in the comments!

Scenes from the NorCal Writers Retreat