Being grateful...

especially when you are feeling like everything has gone wrong

A year ago today, we returned home from winter break late at night. The house was dark. We parked the car in the garage and entered through the side. I could smell it before I could hear it—overpowering mildew. I told my kids, “something is wrong.” Walking into the house, we heard the sounds of rushing water and walked into the kitchen to see water pouring out of our ceiling. The walls were collapsing. The floor was covered with sand. The pantry shelves had all torn out of the walls and were pressed against the doors, threatening to explode. Ceilings were coming down, paintings falling off the walls. My closet and almost everything in it were destroyed. It was after 2 a.m. We were in shock. We shut the power to the house, tried to sleep and figured we’d assess the full extent of the damage in the morning.

It was catastrophic. Over a third of our house was a total loss. Within days, demolitions crews were tearing everything down, stripping the house to the studs. All of my clothing and shoes, almost everything in the kitchen and a bathroom, even our heating sources, were a complete loss.

That’s when I started to be grateful.

My family and my dogs were unharmed.

Our friends rallied around us, inviting us over for home cooked meals and warm company when we were living in the hotel.

Our family was there for us, offering their homes to stay in and whatever help we needed.

Our insurance company liaison was unbelievable, calling to check on us, proactively sharing resources available to us to help us not only get our home repaired, but also to make our lives manageable in the interim.

And there were small miracles.

Almost my entire wardrobe was damaged, but the ceiling held out just above where my grandmother’s purses and dresses were stored. The room where I kept all of the family photos was undamaged. A box of memorabilia where I keep high school correspondences, including letters between me and my best friend—she passed away when we were 18—was untouched.

To be sure, the destruction was devastating. Grades suffered. We had to live in a hotel for several weeks until we found a rental home, so our dogs were at a boarding facility for over a month—they came home depressed. One of our two barn cats went missing just two weeks before we returned and has not returned. My writing suffered terribly. I’m only now really starting to be productive again. We were out of our home for 9 month, and the last 3 months, have lived with continued construction. Now, a year later, we are finally almost done.

Not everyone has what we have. Health, friends, family, insurance. Not everyone gets to rebuild or have people to buoy and support them in a crisis. Not everyone who loses a home gets to keep their pets, and hold and cuddle them when they are feeling down. Not everyone can rebuild.

I’d like to think that I’ve always been thankful for what I have and aware of what others don’t. Especially after the work I did at the Bronx District Attorney’s Office, I am acutely aware of the suffering of others. But in a world that, especially lately, can feel so hostile, I’m trying to double down, not only on my gratitude, but on kindness—even if it’s the smallest thing, like holding open the door for someone, donating to worthy causes, or buying a coffee for the person behind me in line.

I am thankful. I’m thankful to be back in my home with my family this new year, for my dogs at my feet, for our cat, Bandit, who misses his brother and gets extra attention and cuddles from us all. I’m thankful for my family and for my friends, and I’m thankful for all of you.

Happy New Year.

Books and Media That Will Make You Feel Good:

Recommended Books:

The Art of Happiness by His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Recommended Substack and Book:

Imperfectly, Beautifully Human by Brieanna Wilkoff

Brieanna is a wonderful writer and a constant promoter of positivity. Her substack is all about making connections and embracing humanity. Also follow her on X, where she shares daily kindness ideas. She’s up to #360! Her debut young adult novel, I’ll Be There for You is all about paying in forward and is a wonderful, uplifting read, especially for young teens.

Paying it Forward:

If you’ve been following me for a while, you know that I got my publishing deal when I won a twitter pitch competition. For the next week, I’m paying it forward by reviewing and giving feedback on pitches. If you’d like me to review your pitch, email me at contact@sarenastraus.com. That’s all there is to it!

I will also be running a pitch workshop at Arisia in Boston (January 12 - 15). I don’t have the exact date and time yet, but here is the link for the conference, and the other panel I will be on. I hope I’ll see you there! When not on a panel, you can find me at the Broad Universe table!